Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Next Day

- I hated that question that I asked you!

- About what I would do?

- Yes.

- Why?

- Because on some level I feel it broke the magic.. the unspoken agreement.

- But this was a sensible question. I have been scared, too.

- I know. But your trust is unwavering. Also...

- Yes?

- As always in scary matters, I hear my mother's voice, flawlessly aiming for my weakest spot.

- What is it?

- That you did more for her. That you treat me differently, because you take me for granted. That I love you too much for you to treat me with the same respect.

- Does it feel to you like I take you for granted?

- No.

- I don't like it that you live through your mother!

- I don't. I just hear her voice and I don't know how not to. Actually, I don't want it to stop, I just want to be able to identify it as her voice. Then I can decide what to do for myself. That's who I am!

- I understand. So what would you want?

-I want to trust you and I want not to have asked the question in the first place..

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